Wish I could love this a zillion times! 🖤 My daughter is 11 months old today (yay!) and holy shizballs...the first couple of months postpartum were the darkest, most difficult days. I spent sooo much time prepping for my birth (which was the complete opposite of what I had envisioned ha ha), but I barely gave what happens AFTER the fact a moment's thought. As I begin to think about trying for a second baby down the road, focusing on postpartum and setting myself up in the most luxurious way possible is a huge focus!
So much yes to this quote, "I didn't just want to cope, I wanted this to feel like an indulgence, and feel really nourishing and really good, and not just something I have to do to get through this and survive." ✨
I think postpartum is hard and it’s hard to explain to someone who hasn’t been through it just how hard it is. We don’t often hear the details of how hard it can be and we’re also so deep in it with the hormones and the sleep deprivation that it makes sense to plan before we’re in the thick of it. I definitely didn’t but I wish I did.
I feel you! That was me too, first time around. And it's why I love to talk about postpartum, and set up my podcast etc. But when you lean into postpartum, plan for it, think about it as a sacred time - god it can be beautiful! (And still hard, not going to lie haha)
What an amazing beautiful post and interview. THANK YOU! I had an incredibly difficult experience post-partum with my first—suffering severe post-natal anxiety, birth trauma, and giving birth during a pandemic, not to mention our beautiful unsettled "colicky" newborn, who screamed for hours and wasn't a "feed-to-sleep" baby. We love her so much, but neither of us would go back to that time. My husband was especially traumatised, and given we still don't have support, is not up for going through it again How did you convince Michael that it would be worth the potential of doing it a second time around, even if you yourself had prepared so well for a better or more positive post-partum experience?
When the expectation doesn’t match the reality it can be really jolting and I don’t think men can quite understand everything you are going through even if they are trying. The pandemic threw a spanner in the works for everyone, globally. And parents, mothers specifically, really suffered.
I do think that the things we don’t want to talk about probably should be spoken about, and a professional is best. Especially if feel you want another but he is closed off then it might be worth nutting it out.
No support is tough. It truly takes a village, and I believe Naomi does touch on this in her course and ways to ask for help from friends etc I’m sure she will comment in this thread when she gets a moment (currently she’s elbow deep in cookie mix!).
Ah, Hannah, I'm sorry to hear you had that experience. It sounds so familiar!
Honestly, it was a time thing. We both couldn't deal with the thought of having another child until Margot had turned 3. If someone mentioned it to me that first year I felt ill.
I told Michael it would need to be on my terms if we did it again - he'd need to take at least a month off, I wanted to birth at home, and I wanted a doula and money for massages and other therapies to support me. The key was that we planned and had plenty of time for this - to save and to work it all out.
I think by the time Margot was over 3 and chilled out a little we could start to imagine it again, and could talk about what didn't work and how we could do things differently.
We also both always wanted to have two kids and give Margot a sibling - and I wanted a chance to do things differently - so that was the underlying reason I think we did it all again.
Wish I could love this a zillion times! 🖤 My daughter is 11 months old today (yay!) and holy shizballs...the first couple of months postpartum were the darkest, most difficult days. I spent sooo much time prepping for my birth (which was the complete opposite of what I had envisioned ha ha), but I barely gave what happens AFTER the fact a moment's thought. As I begin to think about trying for a second baby down the road, focusing on postpartum and setting myself up in the most luxurious way possible is a huge focus!
So much yes to this quote, "I didn't just want to cope, I wanted this to feel like an indulgence, and feel really nourishing and really good, and not just something I have to do to get through this and survive." ✨
I think postpartum is hard and it’s hard to explain to someone who hasn’t been through it just how hard it is. We don’t often hear the details of how hard it can be and we’re also so deep in it with the hormones and the sleep deprivation that it makes sense to plan before we’re in the thick of it. I definitely didn’t but I wish I did.
I feel you! That was me too, first time around. And it's why I love to talk about postpartum, and set up my podcast etc. But when you lean into postpartum, plan for it, think about it as a sacred time - god it can be beautiful! (And still hard, not going to lie haha)
What an amazing beautiful post and interview. THANK YOU! I had an incredibly difficult experience post-partum with my first—suffering severe post-natal anxiety, birth trauma, and giving birth during a pandemic, not to mention our beautiful unsettled "colicky" newborn, who screamed for hours and wasn't a "feed-to-sleep" baby. We love her so much, but neither of us would go back to that time. My husband was especially traumatised, and given we still don't have support, is not up for going through it again How did you convince Michael that it would be worth the potential of doing it a second time around, even if you yourself had prepared so well for a better or more positive post-partum experience?
When the expectation doesn’t match the reality it can be really jolting and I don’t think men can quite understand everything you are going through even if they are trying. The pandemic threw a spanner in the works for everyone, globally. And parents, mothers specifically, really suffered.
I do think that the things we don’t want to talk about probably should be spoken about, and a professional is best. Especially if feel you want another but he is closed off then it might be worth nutting it out.
No support is tough. It truly takes a village, and I believe Naomi does touch on this in her course and ways to ask for help from friends etc I’m sure she will comment in this thread when she gets a moment (currently she’s elbow deep in cookie mix!).
Ah, Hannah, I'm sorry to hear you had that experience. It sounds so familiar!
Honestly, it was a time thing. We both couldn't deal with the thought of having another child until Margot had turned 3. If someone mentioned it to me that first year I felt ill.
I told Michael it would need to be on my terms if we did it again - he'd need to take at least a month off, I wanted to birth at home, and I wanted a doula and money for massages and other therapies to support me. The key was that we planned and had plenty of time for this - to save and to work it all out.
I think by the time Margot was over 3 and chilled out a little we could start to imagine it again, and could talk about what didn't work and how we could do things differently.
We also both always wanted to have two kids and give Margot a sibling - and I wanted a chance to do things differently - so that was the underlying reason I think we did it all again.
I hope that helps!